I miss you!! ♥
I know I shouldn't be thinking so much. I tried to hold back all my emotions. Told myself that its nothing. They are just some things which are kept deep in ur heart for a long time and you finally let it out which will make u feel better. But the words used kept floating in my mind till I could not take it anymore and asked you. The way you reacted made me felt very disappointed. I dun tink any one who see such thing can take it so calmly and treat it as nth has happened. You knew that I was sensitive. U knew from the moment you wrote that, I will be angry or upset. If not u wont send me that sms. But to be honest, I'm not angry at all. I'm just purely upset. Maybe to you, they are just nth. If you put yourself in my shoes and read it again, you will feel that it is abit too much. I tried to hold till I see you tonight to talk to you. I knew we will quarrel if I asked you thru the phone. But I could not take it anymore. After all the msges you sent to me when I asked for an explanation, I could help it but let my emotions flow. All my lessons were conducted with a very low morale. Nth can help it anymore. Things weren't the same. I took my time to get out of camp today when I used to rush out. I stared blankly in the train instead of sleeping. I dragged myself home. Why are such things happening when things are all going right? My confidence level was there but you brought it all down once again. I know I should trust. You are tired of assurring me that things are alright again and again. You are scared in the past, I more afraid than you do now. I'm so afraid to lose you. Do you ever understand? It took me a very very long time to get with you and touched your heart and eventually put everything down. I finally feel the love from you. I felt so so loved. I have nv felt so loved before and whenever I thought to myself that I have finally have ur heart, such things happen. Baby, I'm sorry if you are angry becoz of my reaction towards it but you are soft hearted. So I'm afraid that things might happened and I'll eventually lose you. Do you get what I'm trying to tell you for the whole afternoon? No matter what, I love you!! And will always do.. I'm sorry. I'm going over to your place now, hope able to see you coz I really miss you since yest morning. F the camp duty!!
8:10:00 PM
